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What’s Really Standing Between You and the Relationship You Deserve?

You’re smart, capable, and done wasting time on the wrong people. This quick, no-fluff quiz reveals the single biggest factor blocking you from the relationship you deserve—and gives you a clear next step to fix it. In less than 5 minutes you’ll get a personalized result and a simple plan tailored to midlife dating (ages 40–70), so you can stop guessing and start dating with clarity and confidence.

You’ll discover:

  • Whether your #1 blocker is Clarity, Boundaries, Pattern-Repeating, or App Strategy

  • The exact action to take this week to change your results

  • A short list of what to stop doing—today

Created by Rick Soetebier, author of Dating Backward and coach to midlife singles for 10+ years.

Click the button below to start.

Start

Question 1 of 10

When you think about your next relationship, which feels most true?

A

I’m not crystal clear on what I want or need.

B

I know what I want but struggle to say “no” to misaligned people.

C

I keep attracting the same wrong traits in partners.

D

I’m fine in person; it’s the apps that drain me.

Question 2 of 10

On first/second dates, your biggest challenge is…

A

Steering the conversation toward values and deal breakers.

B

Leaving when something feels off.

C

Ignoring early flags because there’s chemistry.

D

Even getting to a date—matches stall or feel spammy.

Question 3 of 10

Your Must-Have & Deal-Breaker list is… 

A

In my head, not written.

B

Written, but I bend the rules in the moment.

C

Written, yet I still pick people outside it.

D

I’m focused on photos/filters; not sure how to screen on apps.

Question 4 of 10

When you feel a spark, what happens next? 

A

I skip due diligence and “see where it goes.”

B

I overlook misalignment to avoid conflict or hurting feelings.

C

I repeat a familiar dynamic from past relationships.

D

I worry it’s another catfish/ghost and back away.

Question 5 of 10

Messaging habit you’re least proud of: 

A

I send generic messages because I’m unsure what to ask.

B

I reply fast even when I don’t want to, to be “nice.”

C

I chase unresponsive people longer than I should.

D

I freeze; it all feels like work.

Question 6 of 10

Which statement stings (because it’s true) 

A

“I’ve never clearly defined compatibility.”

B

“I keep people around to avoid being the ‘bad guy.’”

C

“Different face, same problems.”

D

“My profile and app habits probably need an overhaul.”

Question 7 of 10

First date endings usually look like… 

A

Vague next steps—I’m unsure how to qualify.

B

Agreeing to a 2nd date even when I’m not into it.

C

Feeling hooked, then rationalizing red flags.

D

Relief it actually happened; back to swiping dread.

Question 8 of 10

Biggest fear about changing your approach: 

A

I’ll be “too picky” and find no one.

B

I’ll hurt someone or look cold.

C

I’ll be alone if I stop choosing what feels familiar.

D

I’ll waste time learning apps that won’t work.

Question 9 of 10

Pick the coaching win you want most in 30 days: 

A

A written Must-Have/Deal-Breaker list I actually use.

B

Scripts & boundaries to end misaligned dates promptly.

C

A pattern-breaker plan (green/red-flag checklist).

D

A refreshed profile + 3 high-response openers.

Question 10 of 10

Which description feels MOST like you right now? 

A

“I need clarity: define compatibility before chemistry.”

B

“I need boundaries: stop people-pleasing and enforce standards.”

C

“I need to break patterns: stop choosing the familiar wrong traits.”

D

“I need app strategy: profile, messaging, and filtering.”

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